12.30.2008

Is This Guy Sen's Agent?

Marks said he believed he would be a Day 1 pick, but acknowledged that he was making his decision before receiving any feedback from the NFL advisory committee.

http://blog.al.com/auburnbeat/2008/12/family_prayer_convinces_marks.html

I never begrudge a player for leaving college early when that type of money is on the table but I'm not sure what Sen'Derrick is thinking here. Not that he's leaving early but how could he not get feedback from the NFL before making his decision? That seems a little foolish to me. That service is there for players, take advantage of it.

WRAS Exclusive: The Napkin Andre Smith Used To Sign With An Agent


Cadillac Tears Pateller Tendon In His Other Knee

http://www.nfl.com/news/story?id=09000d5d80dc09c0&template=with-video-with-comments&confirm=true

Sen'Derrick Marks Going Pro

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3799449

12.29.2008

Can You Say "Antonio Langham"?

http://blog.al.com/rapsheet/2008/12/smiths_suspension_possibly_lin.html

Once a bunch of cheaters, always a bunch of cheaters.

Auburn Is Prejudiced Against People Without A "Z" In Their Name

As you already know, Gus Malzahn has been hired as Auburn's new offensive coordinator. I love this hire. Before Coach Tuberville was firesigned, I hoped that Malzahn would be the guy brought in as OC. Tulsa ran more than they threw the ball and Malzahn has proven he can win in the SEC and adapt his scheme to the current players, which is something Tony Franklin was unable to do. Malzahn will run with the running backs while Franklin wanted the QB to be the primary ball-carrier.

I will say though that I am surprised by the hire. I guess with Coach Chizik's statements that Auburn would get back to being a smashmouth running football team and with former Pat Dye players popping up as candidates, I never expected this. It looks like Chizik wants to be a run-first team for the 21st century.

And now Auburn gets the guy who started the "Wildnutt" formation trend. Ironic after the post I made the other day. Looks like we'll have to change the name to "Wildgus". Thanks, AUbarnie.

The GMAC Bowl Just Got A Lot More Interesting

http://www.al.com/auburnfootball/mobileregister/index.ssf?/base/sports/1230545749314450.xml&coll=3

12.24.2008

Enough is Enough

Football needs to come up with an official name for the Wildcat formation. I was watching the TCU-Boise State game last night and TCU was running the Wildfrog. Please. I've heard Wildhog, Wildfrog, Wildcat, Wildflash, Wildrebel, and who knows what else. Auburn called it something else but I can't remember what. Miami probably even calls it the Wilddolphin.

It's not like teams that run the wishbone, shotgun, spread or whatever change the name to incorporate the team's nickname into it. Can't we just come up with one name for this phenomenon? I'm going to start calling it the Wildnutt in honor of Houston Nutt since he started this thing and a coach on his staff went to the Dolphins and now it's everywhere.

Wildnutt it is.

12.22.2008

Oklahoma Doesn't Stand A Chance Against Florida

I mean, with sorority girls like this, how can they? You think any Gator co-eds cry like this? Hell, they don't even wear underpants.

I Had A Dream...

...last night that Patrick Nix was named Auburn's new OC. Or was this premonition a nightmare? I'm conflicted.

12.20.2008

You Can't Make This Stuff Up

I especially like the quote regarding Rhoads' "familiarity with our institution".

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3783455

Auburn's defensive coordinator replaces Chizik at Iowa State
Associated Press

DES MOINES, Iowa -- Iowa State hired Paul Rhoads as its football coach on Saturday, giving the Auburn defensive coordinator and former Cyclones assistant a five-year deal worth $5.75 million.

Rhoads spent last season with the Tigers after serving as Pittsburgh's defensive coordinator from 2000 to 2007. A native of nearby Ankeny, he was an assistant with the Cyclones under Dan McCarney from 1995 to 1999.

"Paul Rhoads is an outstanding and intelligent football coach, a highly successful national recruiter and has nearly 10 years of experience as a BCS coordinator," Iowa State athletic director Jamie Pollard said in a statement on Saturday. "He was the one candidate that clearly demonstrated both extensive experience and an extreme passion for and familiarity with our institution.

"In addition, and most importantly, he also has a comprehensive plan for how to be successful at Iowa State."

Iowa State said Rhoads' contract also includes incentives that could increase his salary. The school will hold a news conference later Saturday to introduce Rhoads, 41.
Former Cyclones coach Gene Chizik was introduced as Auburn's head coach on Monday. Chizik was technically Rhoads' boss for about a week.

"In my two face-to-face meetings with Paul this week, it was obvious that his enthusiasm, energy and warm personality would be well-received by our players, fans and university community," Pollard said. "He has a presence with a 'look-you-in-the-eye' style that makes you feel comfortable."

Copyright 2008 by The Associated Press

12.19.2008

Webber Must Not Be Happy About Barkley's Comments Either

Auburn Talks To UGA O-line Coach Searels

http://www.ajc.com/uga/content/sports/uga/stories/2008/12/19/georgia_searels_auburn.html

By Tim Tucker
The Atlanta Journal-Consitution
Friday, December 19, 2008

Athens — Auburn has received permission from Georgia to talk with Bulldogs offensive line coach Stacy Searels about a position on new coach Gene Chizik’s staff.

“They’re talking to him,” Georgia coach Mark Richt said today. “So we’ll see [what happens].”

Searels is in his second season on Georgia’s staff after coaching the offensive line at LSU for four years. He is a graduate of Auburn, where he was an All-American lineman for the Tigers in 1987.

“We’d hate to lose Stacy,” Richt said. “We’d hate to lose anybody.”

Searels, who does not talk to the media, has been often praised by Richt and others for his work with Georgia’s young, injury-depleted offensive line this season.

There also have been rumors that Auburn might pursue Rodney Garner, Georgia’s defensive line coach and recruiting coordinator, for a spot on Chizik’s staff. However, Bulldogs defensive tackle Jeff Owens, who announced Thursday he will return to Georgia next season rather than enter the NFL draft, said Garner told him he’s staying.

This Will Get You Fired Up

Eltoro Freeman from Inside the Auburn Tigers

"I committed to Auburn coming out of high school," Freeman tells Inside The Auburn Tigers. "Auburn University stood behind me when I was at a down point in my life (after not qualifying). They have continued to stick behind me.

"I know Auburn is down right now," he adds. "I have decided to stick behind them. A lot of people have talked about Coach Chizik, a lot of Auburn fans maybe didn't want him as a head coach because of his Iowa State record. I believe in Auburn University. I believe they hired the right guy. He was in a situation of rebuilding Iowa State. When I heard Iowa State was giving him a two-year contract it just answered all the questions I had about him. I"m 110 percent behind him."

Freeman is familiar with Chizik from his coaching days at Auburn when he was part of an undefeated season in 2004. The linebacker says Chizik's past tells you all you want to know about what kind of coach he is and what he gets out of his players.

"I already know he was a great defensive coach with Auburn and Texas," Freeman says. "I also know he's coached three (Jim) Thorpe Award winners. I'm here to tell you right now he's getting ready to coach a Butkus Award winner. To all the people that decommitted or don't want to come to Auburn, good. If we can't get ya we'll beat ya. I'm going to Auburn and I can't wait to get down there and help Coach Chiz and the Auburn family get things turned around."

Bammer of the Week




Auburn's Newest Sociology Major?

Carver lineman Brandon Moore from Inside the Auburn Tigers

“He came by the school today,” says. “At first I thought as a coach he was kind of shaky, but he explained to me why he left Auburn and went to Texas and why he left Texas and went to Iowa State, and then why he left Iowa State and went to Auburn.

“He told me when he was at Auburn they had one of the top five defenses in the country and then had the number one defense in the country,” Moore adds. “Then he left and went to Texas and he was the assistant coach of the year and they won a national championship.”

Because of Auburn’s struggles and the coaching change the Tigers had fallen down Moore’s list with schools such as Alabama, Florida, Miami, Tennessee and Clemson prominent on his radar, but he notes that Chizik’s visit has put Auburn right back in play with him.

“At first they were a little shaky,” Moore says. “Then they were real shaky. Then they were really shaky. Now they are back to ground level.

12.17.2008

Contact WJOX

http://www.wjox690.com/contactus.asp

Paul Finebaum is using the AU coaching situation and controversy to fuel his ratings and get his bald head on ESPN as much as he can and he knows it. He knows what he is saying isn't true but that isn't stopping him.

Contact WJOX and ask them why they don't have an African-American or female personality on air? Shouldn't they? Are there not qualified candidates out there?

The Media Is Coming


12.14.2008

Some Of The Text Messages I Received Yesterday

Please tell me we are not about to hire f****** Chizik? We will be the biggest joke of college sports.

The end of AU football is upon us.

What can we do about this?

We need to overthrow the powers that be at Auburn. We are a joke!!!

Let's go kidnap Turner Gill and take him to the press conference and see what happens.

Chizik??? For serious???

Don't think we made a good hire...may give up the season tickets...there were better choices out there.

It's Lowder, Rane, McWhorter, Dye and Jacobs we should be mad at.

You buying tickets this year?

WTF?!

The only game I'm going to next year is the WVU game. I want to get back at those m***** f******.

Gonna take a whole lotta bourbon and some luck to fix this.

This is the worst coaching hire by an SEC team since Ole Miss hired Orgeron. Looks like Bobby and the BoT got their "yes" man.

Guess who is Gene Chizik's agent?

Jimmy Sexton.

This is a great hire. A really positive step for Auburn and couldn't possibly be anything but a decision made with honesty, integrity and the University's best interests in mind.

12.12.2008

I'm Drained

Will We Replace WDE with BMF?


I've relapsed and have been listening to Birmingham radio this week. Though I knew it would be okay because there wouldn't be much Auburn bashing since everyone feels so sorry for us right now. Al Del Greco and Jay Evans were talking about how an outlet in Mobile and ESPN were saying that Will Muschamp could be named head coach today.
Do I think Turner Gill is the best candidate? Yes. Can I get on board with Muschamp? Yes. I've said all along if it wasn't Gill, Muschamp or Paul Johnson, I would be disappointed. Do I still think Muschamp is the most likely candidate to leave for a better job? Yes, and that worries me.
Another interesting note from this morning's WJOX show was that they actually brought up Al Borges' name in connection with AU's offensive coordinator and also at Iowa State under Gene Chizik. I could live with Al and Will getting the band back together a la Jake and Elwood Blues.

12.10.2008

Blog...The Case for Turner Gill

http://cfn.scout.com/2/820060.html

Check out my above CFN blog piece on Turner Gill.

The Coaching Merry-Go-Round

Jimbo?
Muschamp?
Butch?
Spurrier?
Johnson?
Gill?
Hoke?!
Dooley?!?
Garner?!?!
Nix?!?!?
Graham?!?!?!

Come on, Jay Jacobs, do the right thing and hire Turner Gill. Auburn needs to rock the college football world and send a message. Quit doing everything in your power NOT to hire him with these token interviews to Pat Nix and Rodney Garner. If recruiting is one of your main concerns, then hire Gill. He will be able to keep the majority of the committed players in the fold. Not to mention increase Auburn's footprint to Texas, the midwest and the northeast. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that he'll put people on his staff who are familiar with the southeast. But take a look at Buffalo's roster and you'll see there are a lot of kids from Florida and Texas on it. He recruited them to Buffalo!!!!! The coldest place ever. You think he can't get good kids to come to Auburn?

I don't see anyone else beating down Garner, Nix, Graham, Hoke or Dooley's door to hire them as their head coach. Jimbo isn't leaving FSU and Muschamp will leave to go back to Texas in 5 years. Spurrier is past his prime and will he have the patience to turn around AU's roster before he wants to retire? He is 65 years old after all. Paul Johnson and Butch Davis aren't leaving their cushy ACC jobs. And you say you want a head coach with SEC experience, Todd Graham doesn't have any.

Hire the best candidate. Hire Turner Gill.

Not to mention the added good publicity Auburn will receive nationwide. People will be talking about Auburn and this hire for the next couple of months. Pushing Alabama to the backburner. National media love Turner Gill and hate Nick Saban, give them added fuel to their fire. Get Tom Osborne in your corner. All of these things will just be a bonus added on top of getting the best coach available. If you don't, Jay Jacobs, someone else will and that football program will be the better for it.

12.09.2008

Comment If You Want Turner Gill As Head Coach

Auburn Students Plan Protest

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3757771

http://blog.al.com/spotnews/2008/12/auburn_students_plan_protest_o.html

Students at Auburn University are planning a protest over Tommy Tuberville's departure as football coach.

Planners say hundreds of students are expected to march from the center of campus to the president's mansion today. They say Tuberville was wrongly forced out after 10 years that included an undefeated season and a conference championship.

An organizer of the demonstration, Taylor Jones, says many people believe Tuberville was fired despite the university's claim that he resigned. They're pointing to the school's agreement to pay Tuberville more than $5 million he wouldn't have been due unless he was fired.

A university spokeswoman says Auburn is standing by its statement that Tuberville resigned.

Congratulations, Carnell

One of my all-time favorites is looking more and more like the rookie of the year he was in 2005 each week. He had a great touchdown run last night where he ran right into a linebacker and pushed him back 5 yards for the touchdown. Looked a little like Bo versus the Boz.

12.08.2008

Gogue and Jacobs' E-mail Addresses

athldir@auburn.edu Jay Jacobs
jgogue@auburn.edu Jay Gogue

For The Change We Need

What Happened To The Gatorade Shower?

Hugh Nall Is Doing What?

http://blog.al.com/goldmine/2008/12/auburn_searches_heads_to_new_y.html

One Auburn assistant coach isn't an assistant coach, anymore. Tuberville's offensive line coach for 14 years -- one Hugh Nall -- is out of coaching. He's now the Chief Operating Officer for Southern AG Carriers of Albany, Ga.

12.05.2008

WRAS Exclusive: The Napkin JJ Is Using To Conduct The Coaching Search


You Get What You Ask For

If Auburn got rid of Tommy Tuberville for Houston Nutt, then JJ and BL are dumber than I thought. I will not buy season tickets next year if Bobby Petrino is hired and am inching closer to the same thing if they hire Houston Nutt.

12.04.2008

FORE!

The Puppet Speaks

Don't look at the man behind the curtain with his hand up JJ's ass...

Auburn AD Jay Jacobs on Tuberville, coaching search










Worst. Season. Ever.

So I'm sitting there last night drinking out of my Tommy Tuberville souvenir stadium cup, watching The Story of the 2004 Auburn Tigers and periodically pulling tissues from a Kleenex box when it hits me: this is the worst season in Auburn football history.

We were one of the worst offenses in the country and never played one good football game.
We won a game 3-2 and were laughed at because of it.
We lost to Vanderbilt.
We fired our offensive coordinator halfway through the season.
We lost to Bobby Petrino.
We lost in Morgantown and almost got Auburn fans killed in the process.
We lost to Houston Nutt (again).
We lost for the first time ever in Tuscaloosa.
We had the 6-game winning streak snapped.
We suffered the worst Iron Bowl loss since the 1960s.
We broke our 8-year bowl game streak.
We got rid of Tommy Tuberville.
We watched SPUAT go 12-0.

Metaphorically Speaking...

...is Tuberville the penguin and the BoT are the killer whales?

Truer Words Have Never Been Written

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/columns/story?columnist=maisel_ivan&id=3743358

Auburn split with Tuberville echoes other SEC changes

By Ivan Maisel
ESPN.com

Updated: December 3, 2008

Tommy Tuberville Out As Auburn Head Coach

You're Auburn University and your cross-state rival Alabama, after lying dormant for a decade, has become formidable again. You've had a mediocre season and you won't play in a bowl game for the first time in nine years. But you're OK. You have a coach who has been the model of stability in an unstable business.

You've had Tommy Tuberville for 10 seasons. That became the longest tenure of any coach in the Southeastern Conference once Tennessee fitted Phillip Fulmer with a pair of cement coaching shoes. Even after going 5-7, your coach has won nearly 70 percent of his games against everyone (85-40, .680), and exactly 70 percent (7-3!) against the hated Crimson Tide.
Tuberville has won one SEC and five Western Division titles and been unbeaten one season. That 2004 team performed well enough to play for a national championship. Too bad the BCS ripped you off.

Having a coach like that is good. The last thing you want to do when facing Nick Saban Inc. is call in the moving vans and start over. Only someone with an athletic death wish would trade in a coach with 10 years of recruiting ties throughout the Southeast for a staff that might not be able to find 6A finalist Hoover High with a pack of bloodhounds and a Garmin.

You're Auburn, and you're too big, too sure of yourself to panic every time someone in Tuscaloosa raises a trophy. Once upon a time you panicked. Remember five years ago, when the university president led a secret delegation to interview Bobby Petrino at Louisville? That president and the genius boosters who egged him on forgot that Auburn still employed a football coach. They also proved to be about as clandestine as Inspector Clouseau.

Tommy Tuberville coached the Tigers to an 85-40 record during his Auburn tenure.The media mocked you for months, and you looked even dumber when Tuberville took the team to a 13-0 record a year later.

Good thing that president is long gone. You've got a new athletic director, too. Surely they wouldn't be stupid enough to make the same mistake and run off Tuberville. During games, he barely has a pulse. They call him the Riverboat Gambler for his play-calling guts. And big games? Not only is he 7-3 against Alabama, he has won nine of his past 14 games against top-10 teams.

Off the field, his players don't get in trouble. They go to class, too. In 2007, 20 players had at least a 3.0 GPA.

It's like they say on Wall Street. When the masses are selling, the smart guys are buying. The SEC masses are selling. Tennessee is starting over with 33-year-old Lane Kiffin. Mississippi State forced out Sly Croom. You want to know what not to do? LSU fans are grumbling about Les Miles one year after he held the crystal football!

That leaves Ole Miss and Arkansas, and if you're worried about them, you're not the Auburn you claim to be.

Sure, Tuberville doomed this season to mediocrity the minute he hired that offensive coordinator, the high school guru who promised to install the spread offense. Turns out that knowledge-wise, the guy had outkicked his coverage. Tuberville fired him a month into the season, admitted his mistake, and tried to minimize the damage. He didn't pawn off the responsibility on anyone else. He took the blame and promised to fix the problem.
Yeah, those boosters, the ones who embarrassed you over Petrino, are still unhappy, but you're Auburn. You're bigger than that. No coach is going to win in the SEC every season. Tuberville has delivered for you for 10 years. Surely that engenders some loyalty from you to him.
Besides, you signed a contract that promised him $6 million if you let him go after the 2008 season. In these economic times, with people everywhere trying to hold on to their jobs and their mortgages, you surely aren't stupid enough to spend $6 million paying a guy not to coach. No one could be that insensitive to the message that would send. Talk about misplaced priorities.

What's that?

You let him go?

You're going to pay him $6 million not to coach?

And start over from scratch? Against Nick Saban?

You're kidding, right? Is there something about Tommy Tuberville that causes you to make agonizingly stupid decisions?

Forget I ever brought it up. Good luck finding a coach better than the one you just forced out.

Whoever he is, give him a message:

Hoover High is just south of Birmingham.

12.03.2008

Say A Silent Prayer For Al Del Greco

I stopped listening to Bammerham radio propaganda back in October nor have I clicked on articles written by obvious Bammers, but people have been keeping me updated.

These last few months must have been hard for Al to come to work every day. Trying to squeeze by Tony Kurre's nose and oversized ego into the WJOX booth, being blinded by Jay Barker-Evans' mystic tan and having to look at the clothes that Sara Evans laid out for him.

Now comes this week and he probably just wants to take a 2-iron to everyone around him.

Meetings, Schmeetings

Why does Auburn do this song and dance routine every year with Coach Tuberville? Auburn's coaches, players, recruits, employees and fans hang in limbo while the powers that be decide what to do. All the while Tennessee is hiring one of the hottest young coaches (not as hot as his wife though) in football, Texas and Florida State name former Auburn assistants coaches-in-waiting and Washington has flown Mike Leach in to Seattle to talk about their vacancy. They know whether or not they want to keep Tuberville and there is no way in hell Tuberville is quitting and paying his part of the buyout. So come out and say it and end this madness. I'm sure they are talking about the assitants, most of which I don't expect back in 2009. Tuberville is not the problem, he deserves to be back and I think he will. The problem is Jay Jacobs and the meddling Board of Trustees. They have to go, Auburn and Tommy Tuberville deserve better than this.

12.02.2008

At Least Spell His Name Right, Bammers!

I get these emails from Pleasure is All Wine (though this will be the last one as I'll never shop there again) and here is today's, as requested by Nick Sabin...

NEW CORK TIMES

"Removing snobbery from wine, one cork at a time."

ROLL TIDE ROLL

AS REQUESTED BY NICK SABIN... WE HAVE POSTPONED OUR SIDEWALK SALE TO SATURDAY DECEMBER 13TH 10am to 6pm Free Wine Tastings, Door Prizes, Live Music & More!!! GREAT GIFT IDEAS FOR CHRISTMASGourmet Gift Baskets Wine of the Month Club Membership Gift Cards Specialty Wine ItemsGourmet Food 205-985-4760

THIS FRIDAY....DECEMBER 5 @ 6:00 pm PLEASURE'S TREASURE'S TASTING!!!

Just in time for your Christmas gatherings...great wines for great value!

Our Largest Tasting of the Month!! Pleasure's Treasures "exceptional wines for exceptional value" all wines are under $15. We are tasting 25-30 wines from our Treasure Chest! $10 plus tax ($5 back with the purchase of a wine/s tasted at the event of a value of $14.99 or greater) includes sampling Pleasure's gourmet goodies! Don't forget.....10% off all cases! Call and reserve your place as we have to limit the number of guests at this event to ensure everyone attending can taste through the wines. 205-985-4760

Pleasure Is All Wine 200 Bowling Lane, Suite 210 Pelham, AL 35124
205-985-4760 http://www.pleasureisallwine.com/
(Located up the hill from McAllister's and down from Oak Mt. Bowling Lanes)

But is she hotter than Fulmer's wife?

You be the judge.

11.26.2008

Jim Beam & Mountain Dew News

The other day I heard the song "Choices" by George Jones and it got me thinking that we have the right in this country to make choices everyday in our lives. From who to vote for president, the car we drive and who we marry. It is our choice. BUT when it comes to Auburn and Alabama you don't have a choice, you are born with it in your BLOOD. People have asked me why I chose to be an Auburn fan and I tell them I didn't, Auburn chose me. I was born with Orange and Blue in my veins and I was born to HATE Alabama!!! I despise the UAT, I have no compassion for their professors, students or fans and the history of their football program is built on Lies and Cheaters!!! So what if the "Bear" coached there. He is dead, get over it. So what if they claim 12 national championships? Half of them are built on lies and are not even recognized by the NCAA and the SEC. Who are they to think they can give themselves a "NC" when they didn't even finish #1 in the country in the final polls. Look at the line of coaches they have been through in the past 10 years, more cheaters and liars. What do you expect, they were trying to follow that "Bama Tradition". I understand that Saban has turned things around in his 2nd year and that they are 11-0 and are #1 in country. But look at the year of 2008 as a whole, does anything make sense? The economy, gas at $4.00 per gallon, Obama, wall street bailout, the Franklin system, gas drops to $1.55 in less than two months, Pat Dye finding his pants in the bottom of Lake Martin and Auburn with a record of 5-6. NOTHING is MAKING SENSE!!!

When I walked out of the UGa game 2 weeks ago, it was the 1st time this year that I walked out not being frustrated with my Tigers. I believe that Kodi is coming along and I believe that if he was our starter the whole season we would not be 5-6 right now. But I still don't know what to expect on Saturday against the Tide. WE MUST BELIEVE!!!

ATTN: Paul Rhodes and AU Defense - This is your game to win. You are going to have to keep UAT down to keep the offense in the game. With everyone getting healthy we should be able to come out and knock heads like we were in the 1st half of the season!!!

The last time we went into the UAT game where we had a losing record and we won the game was in 1949.

The last time we played UAT on Nov. 29 was in 1986 and we all know who scored the winning touchdown!!!




The bottom line is that we have not won a game this year that we were not supposed to win. Going into Tuberville-Denny we have the chance to knock UAT out of the top spot, to continue the streak, and to salvage a tough heart-breaking season. The Auburn Nation should be more FIRED up than ever before!!! I wish I could be in that locker room before the game to let those players and coaches know that no matter what happens Saturday that we will be behind them 100% at the end of the day. To the players, this is a game were legends are made and that you could have your name right up there with Newton, Langer, Campbell, Jackson, Tillman, Slack, Wright, Joseph, Nix, Sanders, Bostic, Houston, Reese, Holmes, Duval, Smith, Cadillac, Campbell, McClover and Cox...just to name a few!!! Guys, it was your "Choice" to wear the Orange and Blue and it is time to show the nation that the Auburn program is still alive and that the state of Alabama is still ruled by the boys on the Plains!!!

It time for the Auburn Nation to stand up and shout -

"We an't going take this Bull Shit anymore, GO TO HELL ALABAMA"

PATRICK FAIN DYE - APPROVES THIS MESSAGE!!!
Trust me I know that the "Bear" was a cheat!!!


WRAS Picks the SEC - Week 14

Auburn (+14) @ SPUAT

Walt Flanagan: Auburn 17 - Those toothless, trailer park bastards 14
Morris Fenderbaum: Auburn 23 - University of Houndsteeth 21 CANNONBAAAAALLLLL!!!!!
Mickey Goldmill: Mickey's holed up in a meat locker punching slabs of beef in preparation for Saturday. He is unavailable for comment.

Ole Miss (-13.5) vs. Mississippi State

Walt Flanagan: Ole Miss 28 - Mississippi State 14
Morris Fenderbaum: Ole Miss 38 - Mississippi State 17
Mickey Goldmill: Mickey's also only eating raw eggs from now until Saturday, I guess in honor of the Egg Bowl.

LSU (-4.5) vs. Arkansas

Walt Flanagan: LSU 28 - Arkansas 21
Morris Fenderbaum: Arkansas 24 - LSU 18 CANNONBAAAAALLLLL RUN 2!!!!!
Mickey Goldmill: I'll call this "The Second Thought Bowl". The Hat having second thoughts about Ann Arbor and the Razorbacks having second thoughts about running off Houston Nutt.

Georgia (-8.5) vs. Georgia Tech

Walt Flanagan: UGa 24 - GT 21
Morris Fenderbaum: GT 27 - UGa 23 CANNONBAAAAALLLLL RUN 3: SPEED ZONE!!!!!
Mickey Goldmill: How good would Kodi, Super Mario and Benny Tate look in the nerd's offense?

Clemson (-1) vs. South Carolina

Walt Flanagan: USC 17 - Clemson 13
Morris Fenderbaum: USC 31 - Clemson 16
Mickey Goldmill: The only way I turn my head towards this game is if there is another brawl.



Florida (-15.5) @ Florida State

Walt Flanagan: Florida 45 - FSU 21
Morris Fenderbaum: Florida 48 - FSU 17
Mickey Goldmill: Another ACC team? Is this the SEC-ACC Challenge or something?

Tennessee (-4.5) vs. Kentucky

Walt Flanagan: UT 21 - UK 17
Morris Fenderbaum: UK 25 - UT 23 CANNONBAAAAALLLLL RUN EUROPE: GREAT ESCAPE!!!!!
Mickey Goldmill: Goodbye, Phil, have a donut on me.

Wake Forest (-4) vs. Vanderbilt

Walt Flanagan: Wake Forest 28 - Vanderbilt 17
Morris Fenderbaum: Wake Forest 28 - Vanderbilt 17
Mickey Goldmill: Just change this to WRAS Picks the ACC.

Last Week:

Walt: (1-3 straight up, 2-2 versus the spread)
Morris: (2-2, 2-2)
Mickey: (3-1, 3-1)

Total:

Walt: (62-26, 40-48)
Morris: (62-26, 46-42)
Mickey: (62-26, 42-46)

1970 Iron Bowl

1957 Iron Bowl

1986 Iron Bowl

2002 Iron Bowl

2004 Iron Bowl



2007 Iron Bowl Aftermath

Tillman On The End Around Reverse

11.25.2008

James Bostic

Nix to Sanders

1987 Iron Bowl

1982 Iron Bowl

1988 Iron Bowl

1997 Iron Bowl

Great Iron Bowl Upsets

Tre Smith

Bammer of the Day



Paper Shakers

Pat Dye Postgame Speech After 1989 Iron Bowl

Toomer's Corner 2007

Quentin Leads The Band In Rammer Jammer



Rammer Jammer, Go To Hell, Alabama



Got 11?

Go Crazy Cadillac!

Bo Over The Top

Bye Bye Bo

Punt Bama Punt

11.21.2008

Bammer of the Day

So You're Saying There's A Chance?

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB122723273538146713.html

Even a rule that prevents teams with lousy records from playing in bowls may have to be bent: There are 68 bowl berths available this season, but as of today, only 61 teams have enough wins (typically six) to qualify -- a potentially embarrassing situation that has forced the NCAA to start thinking about contingency plans which, it says, could involve letting in a team with a losing record.

WRAS Picks the SEC - Week 13

Since Auburn doesn’t have a chance of losing again this week, Mickey will make picks this week.

Vanderbilt (-3) vs. Tennessee

Walt Flanagan: Vandy 20 - UT 14
Morris Fenderbaum: Vandy 24 - UT 17
Mickey Goldmill: Vandy beats Phil. Sad, very Sad. Vandy 28 – UT 20

Florida (no line) vs. The Citadel

Walt Flanagan: Florida 56 - Citadel 7
Morris Fenderbaum: Florida 70 - Citadel 10 (playing a game versus The Citadel automatically disqualifies UF from BCS MNC game - see AU 2004 precedent)
Mickey Goldmill: As if you needed help with this one…UF 65 – Citadel 0

Mississippi State (-1) vs. Arkansas

Walt Flanagan: Arkansas 21 - MSU 13
Morris Fenderbaum: Arkansas 13 - MSU 9
Mickey Goldmill: Boy, these teams are bad, kinda like Auburn. It’s Petrino’s turn to get Croomed. Can we still use that term? Anyway. since the Hogs are traveling to Starkghanistan, Mickey likes the Bulldogs 21 – 17

LSU (-5) vs. Ole Miss

Walt Flanagan: LSU 27 - Ole Miss 23
Morris Fenderbaum: Ole Miss 20 - LSU 17 CANNONBAAAAALLLLL!!!!!
Mickey Goldmill: Can you say upset? Colonel Reb is cryin' no more. Hotty Toddy 30 – Deep Fried Cajun Nastiness 28

Last Week:

Walt: (5-1 straight up, 3-3 versus the spread)
Morris: (5-1, 4-2)
Mickey: (0-6, 0-6)

Total:

Walt: (61-23, 38-46)
Morris: (60-24, 44-40)
Mickey: (59-25, 39-45)

CFN Week 13 Preview

http://cfn.scout.com/2/778387.html

11.20.2008

Auburn Achieves Highest Ranking Since Before LSU Game

http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/2008/11/20/disappointment-has-a-flavor-three/#more-7757

#3 on EDSBS' Top 5 Disappointments

Bammer of the Day

This is an email my future Bammer father-n-law sent me. Mind you, he grew up in Pennsylvania a Nittany Lion fan and his family are Auburn fans, but I digress. I just replied back with a picture of his first born wearing an Auburn shirt. There's no response to that!

I'll bet some form of this has come out with every coach they've had in the last 10 years. I love the part, "a great photograph of the three last week" as if it's real and Forrest Gump isn't a fictional character played by the guy from Bosom Buddies and he really did run that kick back for a touchdown.

Some interesting facts…a great photograph taken of the three last week

Both coaches coached at 3 universities before coming to Alabama.
Both coaches coached 1 year at their first coaching job.
Both coaches came to the University of Alabama with 91 wins.
Both coaches won their 100th game in their 2nd season at Alabama.
The 100th win was against Tulane for both coaches.
Even more interesting is the total points in the game against Tulane…you guessed it, the same (26) for Bryant 19-7, Saban 20-6.
Both coaches struggled with going to the pros and Bryant changed his mind, Saban did not but it was the same team, (Miami Dolphins) and it led to both getting back to Alabama.
ALABAMA was the second stop in the SEC for both of them and will most likely be where they both retire.

Plus, "AN" are the 4th and 5th letters of both of their last names!

11.18.2008

Bammer of the Day



Why do Bammers not like undershirts? Is it because they don't have necks?

11.14.2008

WRAS Picks the SEC - Week 12

Auburn is undefeated and all would be right with the world except for the fact it's basketball and nobody cares. War Damn Eagle! Mickey's not picking again until Auburn wins an SEC game.

Mississippi State (+19.5) @ SPUAT

Walt Flanagan: SPUAT 24 - MSU 3
Morris Fenderbaum: SPUAT 28 - MSU 13
Mickey Goldmill: Mickey can't handle picking SPUAT to win again.

South Carolina (+21) @ Florida

Walt Flanagan: Florida 35 - USC 17
Morris Fenderbaum: Florida 49 - USC 10
Mickey Goldmill: F the Gaytors, their crocs, jorts and their old coach.

Georgia (-8) @ Auburn

Walt Flanagan: Georgia 24 - Auburn 17
Morris Fenderbaum: Georgia 35 - Auburn 17
Mickey Goldmill: Maybe they'll turn the sprinklers on again. "UGa cam" was the worst idea ever.

UL Monroe (+21) @ Ole Miss

Walt Flanagan: Ole Miss 35 - ULM 7
Morris Fenderbaum: Ole Miss 38 - ULM 9
Mickey Goldmill: Remember the good ole days when ULM used to beat SPUAT?

Troy (+19.5) @ LSU

Walt Flanagan: LSU 38 - Troy 17
Morris Fenderbaum: LSU 31 - Troy 13
Mickey Goldmill: Is Tony Franklin back coaching at Troy yet?

Vanderbilt (+4.5) @ Kentucky

Walt Flanagan: Kentucky 17 - Vandy 10
Morris Fenderbaum: Kentucky 27 - Vandy 24
Mickey Goldmill: Kentucky and Vandy are going bowling. I'm gonna staple my eyelids shut.

Last Week:

Walt: (5-1 straight up, 3-3 versus the spread)
Morris: (4-2, 3-3)
Mickey: (5-1, 4-2)

Total:

Walt: (56-22, 35-43)
Morris: (55-23, 40-38)
Mickey: (59-19, 39-39)

Bammer of the Week


It's a sad day for me to see this. And what's up with the Cincinnati Reds' shirt?

Keys To An Auburn Win These Final Two Weeks

1. Don't hold on offensive line.
2. Don't move before the snap on offensive line.
3. Block for QB and don't let him get sacked.
4. Don't run backward when you have the ball.
5. Catch the ball if the QB throws it to you.
6. On defense, actually tackle the opposing player with the ball instead of staring as he runs by.
7. On coaching, don't call an option play for the short side of the field where there is no place to run.
8. On coaching, try a different play if the first 3 attempts at a play don't work.
9. On coaching, line up under center and try to run forward instead of east/west, before getting tackled for a one yard gain.
10. On coaching, use timeouts if there is still time to pull out a miraculous but dubious win.
11. On coaching, try to act like you are excited about being there and maybe the players will catch on.

Bammer of the Week

http://www.al.com/news/press-register/metro.ssf?/base/news/122657141687740.xml&coll=3

We have to stop all this red on red crime.

CFN SEC Week 12 Preview

http://cfn.scout.com/2/778387.html

11.13.2008

Jim Beam & Mountain Dew News

A long time ago YKWPD said, "to win the SEC you have to win Amen Corner". We have won the SEC six times and every time we won Amen Corner, but in 2008 it has a whole new meaning. Win Amen Corner and let the partying begin, split and we can look forward to a bright future, lose and we can allt hank God this year is over!!!

But DAMN IT - I BELIEVE AND YOU SHOULD ALSO!!!

This is the 112th meeting of the Deep South's Oldest Rivalry and is such a huge game every year recruiting wise because the way Auburn is so close to the Georgia state line. The state of Georgia has given Auburn some of its biggest coaches and players but none bigger than -

In 1978 Auburn wore orange jerseys against UGa for the 1st time since the Tulane game in 1955. Last year UGa wore black to get fired up. Maybe we should wear the orange to get the Tigers fired up.

Did UT Martin leave any in the locker room?

In the last 12 meetings the lower ranked or unranked team has won 7 times. Over the same period the teams have split the games.

AUBURN has won 51 consecutive games when the Tigers have scored 30 or more points.
Can you tell me when the last time the Tigers lost when scoring at least 30 points?

I know it's an early game but we can do this.

Last thought, I was in Athens last year and witnessed the dancing Dawgs and their classless act. I know that many of our players and fans are still upset with it and have been very public about it this week. One thing I love about AUBURN is that no matter what happens before, during or after a game the AUBURN NATION has always shown the most upright respect for the opponent and their fans. It has been 22 years since we turned on the sprinklers. So if somehow UGa gets out of hand, I know just the right person to call to get the switch flipped!!!

You think AU is MAN enough to beat them Dawgs? I hope so because if not the Loveliest Village on the Plains may not be so lovely anymore!!!

PATRICK FAIN DYE - APPROVES THIS MESSAGE!!!


11.10.2008

Football Dispute Leaves Two Dead

http://www.al.com/news/press-register/metro.ssf?/base/news/122631213873770.xml&coll=3

Is it just me or are there an inordinate amount of stories like this that involve Bammers?

11.07.2008

WRAS Picks the SEC - Week 11

SPUAT (-3.5) @ LSU

Walt Flanagan: SPUAT 24 - LSU 21
Morris Fenderbaum: LSU 28 - SPUAT 24
Mickey Goldmill: SPUAT 28 - LSU 21

Georgia (-10.5) @ Kentucky

Walt Flanagan: Georgia 24 - Kentucky 10
Morris Fenderbaum: Georgia 31 - Kentucky 20
Mickey Goldmill: Georgia 28 - Kentucky 14

South Carolina (-10) vs. Arkansas

Walt Flanagan: South Carolina 28 - Arkansas 17
Morris Fenderbaum: South Carolina 17 - Arkansas 13
Mickey Goldmill: South Carolina 27 - Arkansas 13

Tennessee (-25.5) vs. Wyoming

Walt Flanagan: Tennesse 28 - Wyoming 0
Morris Fenderbaum: Tennessee 38 - Wyoming 13
Mickey Goldmill: Tennessee 35 - Wyoming 7

Auburn (no line) vs. UT Martin

Walt Flanagan: Auburn 31 - UT Martin 10
Morris Fenderbaum: Auburn 35 - UT Martin 10
Mickey Goldmill: Auburn 28 - UT Martin 7

Florida (-23) @ Vanderbilt

Walt Flanagan: Florida 42 - Vandy 10
Morris Fenderbaum: Florida 55 - Vandy 17
Mickey Goldmill: Florida 56 - Vandy 14

Last Week:

Walt: (5-2 straight up, 3-4 versus the spread)
Morris: (5-2, 5-2)
Mickey: (5-2, 6-1)

Total:

Walt: (51-21, 32-40)
Morris: (51-21, 37-35)
Mickey: (54-18, 35-37)

11.04.2008

Auburn Doesn't Need A New Coach

It needs a new athletic director. So, I'm throwing my hat in the ring.

Yes we can!

Seriously though, college football is a big business and promoting old lettermen is not the way to run a progressive athletic department. The majority of schools are now hiring lawyers and people who have run multi-million dollar businesses to run the athletic department. This is what Auburn needs to compete going forward, not a quick fix at head coach.

Monday Night Football

Tough loss for the Redskins last night and Jason Campbell didn't have a great game. But Ron Jaworski called Campbell the first half MVP and Mike Tirico mentioned that Auburn was robbed in 2004.

Carlos Rogers had a nice game and should have had a pick six but dropped an easy interception.

11.03.2008

Regarding All the Coaching Rumors

Here's one I just heard in my head...AU is going to hire Boom as HC and Applewhite as OC from Texas (to stick it to Saban) with Ed Orgeron as the DL coach. David Cutcliffe has staged a coup to oust Fulmer backed by Johnny Majors and Spurrier is going back to Duke. Clemson is bringing Rich Rodriguez back and Les Miles will take over at Michigan. Jimbo Fisher is going to back out on his commitment to FSU and return to LSU leaving Tommy Bowden to replace Diddy Bowden who will hire Terry as his OC.

Breaking News out of Knoxville

http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3679810

Phillip Fulmer, who a decade ago brought Tennessee its first national championship in 47 years, will not return as the Volunteers' coach next year, multiple sources told ESPN.com.

An announcement is being planned for later Monday at Neyland Stadium. Fulmer, who has won 150 games at his alma mater and is the dean of SEC coaches, met with Tennessee officials Monday morning, and they reached a mutual agreement that it would be best for all parties if Fulmer did not return next season.

The sides also agreed that Fulmer would coach the remainder of the 2008 season.
The Vols (3-6, 1-5 SEC) have lost four straight games and are in danger of posting their second losing season in the last four years.

"Anybody that likes Tennessee and cares about what the product looks like on the field is frustrated," Fulmer said Sunday night, according to The Tennessean.

In the story posted on the Nashville newspaper's Web site, Fulmer told his coaches in a Sunday meeting to shield the players from their frustration.

"It's about our energy, the looks in our eyes, our demeanor and how we approach it in meetings and film sessions," Fulmer said about his coaching staff, according to the Tennessean. "We're professionals and we have and we will continue to be looking forward to playing."

There had been increasing scrutiny on Fulmer, who took over full time as head coach in 1993 and has been at his alma mater as a player, assistant coach and head coach for more than 30 years.

The Vols won the national title in 1998 and were one of the top programs in all of college football in the 1990s, but the program hasn't been the same this decade. They've lost 31 games since the end of the 2001 season.

Chris Low covers the SEC for ESPN.com.

Auburn Needs to Visit This Place

Let me start off by saying this has been the most excruciating and tiring Auburn season of my lifetime. I have never seen an Auburn team play this poorly and it's sapping my strength.

Coach Tubs says that this team hasn't quit and I don't think the players have but what is going on with this team? When AU had the ball around the 40 yard line towards the end of the first half and 3 timeouts left, why weren't they trying to score?

I didn't go to the game and have been fighting a sore throat so I spent a lot of time Saturday on the couch watching football. I watched Michigan State, Northwestern, Florida, Florida State, Georgia Tech, Oklahoma, Texas, Texas Tech, and others for long periods of time and I figured out one thing about the zone-read handoff play that Auburn can't run effectively to save their lives; when AU hands off to the RBs, they try to run out wide and it never works. The teams that I saw play on Saturday who run this play do one thing on that play - they run it up the middle. Running it out wide allows fast defenses to contain it while up the middle it's a quick-hitter and doesn't allow the defense to react quickly enough. The only time it ever works running out wide is if you have someone as fast as Percy Harvin, and I love Benny Tate and Brad Lester but they aren't that fast. So why do we continue to do that?

I want Tubs to stay on as coach but a complete overhaul of the offensive staff is needed. If Tubs stays and hires an outside OC then every single member of the offensive staff (except for maybe Eddie Gran) should have to interview for their jobs. If the OC decides he wants to keep them, then so be it, but it should be up to him to have the staff around him that he wants. Not one he's forced into.

10.31.2008

WRAS Picks the SEC - Week 10

Auburn (+6) @ Ole Miss

Walt Flanagan: If my Tigers don't win this game, I won't pick them to win another SEC game this eyear...AU 24 - Ole Miss 21
Morris Fenderbaum: Ole Miss 28 - AU 20
Mickey Goldmill: Son-of-a……..do I really have to keep picking games? I can’t remember being less excited about Auburn football. UM 24 – AU 20

Tulsa (-7) @ Arkansas

Walt Flanagan: Tulsa 31 - Arkansas 28
Morris Fenderbaum: Tulsa 23 - Arkansas 20
Mickey Goldmill: Would Tulsa be favored over Auburn too? Yep. And for all the folks who think Gus Malzahn should be a candidate for our new OC, kiss Mickey’s shoe. Tulsa wins this and proves that Auburn is really bad, since we lost to Arky. Tulsa 38 – Hogs 32

Miss. State (-3) vs. Kentucky

Walt Flanagan: Kentucky 20 - MSU 14
Morris Fenderbaum: Kentucky 17 - MSU 9
Mickey Goldmill: No comment. Can these two teams tie? MSU 21 – UK 21

SPUAT (-23.5) vs. Arkansas State

Walt Flanagan: SPUAT 35 - Arkansas State 3
Morris Fenderbaum: The Process 48 - Another Team With A Losing Record 13
Mickey Goldmill: The Tahd has a tendency to play to their level of competition in these games, plus they will be looking ahead to LSwho. Who am I kidding? Turds 38 – ASU 7

Florida (-5.5) vs. Georgia

Walt Flanagan: Who is more gay? The Gaytors or Ugay? I say Florida. Florida 31 - Georgia 27
Morris Fenderbaum: Florida 37 - Georgia 24
Mickey Goldmill: What is the over/under on the number of cocktails actually consumed in Jacksonville this weekend? I’m going with eleventy-niner million. That seems about right. Ever since Tebow cried in the post game presser after loosing to Ole Miss, UF has looked like the team everyone expected in the preseason. UGay was exposed by the Turds physical style of play but then crushed the corndoggers. Should be one for the ages. Mickey likes the Gaytors. UF 35 – UGay 27

South Carolina (-6) vs. Tennessee

Walt Flanagan: USC 17 - UT 14
Morris Fenderbaum: UT 20 - USC 10 CANNONBAAAAALLLLL!!!!!
Mickey Goldmill: The Ball Coach vs. Fat Phil. This might just be the last time these two foes are on opposite sidelines. Something tells Mickey that SOS would love nothing more than to send Phil out as a loser. Cocks 31 – UT 24

LSU (-25.5) vs. Tulane

Walt Flanagan: LSU 38 - Tulane 7
Morris Fenderbaum: LSU 45 - Tulane 17
Mickey Goldmill: Does anyone really care? LSU 35 – Tulane 10

Last Week:

Walt: (4-3 straight up, 4-3 versus the spread)
Morris: (5-2, 2-5)
Mickey: (5-2, 6-1)

Total:

Walt: (46-19, 29-36)
Morris: (46-19, 32-33)
Mickey: (49-16, 29-36)

No Way In Hell, West Virginia

A wise man once said, "That John Denver's full of shit, man". He couldn't be more right. WRAS went to Morgantown for the game and here is long-awaited account.

We get into Pittsburgh and jump in our sweet-ass Dodge hemi minivan and get on the road. After checking into the hotel, The Best Western Mountaineer Inn next to Sheetz (largest gas station in the world and the only one in Morgantown I guess plus they have 40 oz so we picked up some of those), we head downtown to High Street. We went into a sports bar called The Sports Page. Good place and there are a handful of other AU fans in there but most people are watching the Phillies-Rays game. Supposedly, the place is famous for their wings and we got some. They were good but the highlight (or downfall evidenced the next morning) was the pepper jack cheese stuffed soft pretzel. It was damn good but tore my ass up the next morning.

Either that or the freaking smorgasboard of free drinks Morgantown has to offer...

No wonder this place is the #1 party school in America. They are proud of it too as we saw several people with shirts that stated it. As we're walking out of The Sports Page, three guys cross our paths and holler for us to come with them. They seemed like good guys, our age, and one of them was from Huntsville. We're game, so we follow them to a place called Chasers. In between a bouncer is telling us that they are offering free drinks for a $5 cover. The place doesn't have a sign and you can't see in the windows, plus the bouncer looked a little gay so we just kept walking. Anyway, back to Chasers, there is a line outside and the place has a tiny door next to a bank. Once I pay my cover I walk in and the bouncer asks to frisk me. He made all of us put our hands against the wall and spread 'em, where the fuck are we going?!?! The bar has steps that lead underground and as I set foot inside there is loud dance music and a lot of red on the walls. Blood? Anyway, the bar manager sees us and starts talking to us and is glad we came all this way from Auburn. We find out that this place is offering 50 cent pitchers and sure enough, everyone is walking around with cups and pitchers in their hands. So we get our beers and walk to the main area. It's a huge room, kind of dingy but there are a ton of people there and it has a cage for people to dance in and a stripper pole. The place is filled w/ hood rats (my name for WVU guys who wear nothing but hoodies) and girls dressed in 80s clothes. We're talking short shorts, pumps, tight jeans, suspenders and pimp hats. We're dancing a little bit, drinking our pitchers and watching the crowd when a couple of us go to the bar. I get a phone call from one of my friends saying he got kicked out and doesn't know why. We've been talking to the manager who gave us some free beers since the pitcher specials ran out and he says he'll get our friend back in. We see a couple of gigantic WVU offensive lineman shaking their asses and grabbing any girl within their reach. And at the end of the night the DJ plays a techno version of "Take Me Home, Country Roads".


We wake up the next morning hung over and I can barely breathe. It's like I have 75% lung capacity or something. Plus, III decides to turn the hotel mini-fridge's temperature all the way down and the Gatorade I was dying for is nothing but frozen slush. Great way to start off the day. At least the beers in there didn't explode. We head back downtown and decide to eat lunch at a place called the Boston Beanery (where Auburn people are meeting up). Cool place but smokey and the hair of the dog that bit us the night before isn't working. But we start to feel better thanks to steak sandwiches with ranch dressing. Turns out there are two Beanerys and we're at the wrong one. We head towards the stadium and find the other Beanery and park in the lot where we can leave our car and tailgate if we want to. Industrious as one of my friends is, he goes into the CVS next door and finds they have cold beers in singles. So we get a few of those and start tailgating outside of the Beanery. Meet some cool Auburn people and Ben Tate's family is tailgating in the lot as well (but they call him Benny so that's what I'm calling him from now on). Two AU grads from Atlanta are parked near us and we start talking. Turns out one of them has my brother's old Gadsden Tiger hat from 10 years ago which leads me into this story...

It's the 1999 AU-Florida game. My brother is 16 years old and is staying with me for the weekend. He's never hung out with a bunch of college people before and is having a good time at our tailgate. Some friends, including III, are about to do some shots of Jim Beam before heading into JHS. My brother is with them and they offer him one. He proceeds to turn the plastic liter bottle up and has downed half of it before he stops. Pandemonia ensues as that is some tough juice right there. About 30 minutes later we are in the stadium and my brother has lost it. He can barely stand up, he is d-r-u-n-k. This was the most crowded the student section has ever been except for this circle around my brother and this other unknown girl who looks to be in even worse shape than my brother. They are leaning on each other and puking, puking and leaning. My brother has this orange hat that says "Tigers" real big and "Gadsden" below it. He's using it to wipe his mouth and occasionally puke in. Eventually, it's just sitting next to him and this dickhole Florida fan (they're beating us pretty good by now) runs by yelling and picks up the hat and puts it in. Of course, puke goes all over him and we laugh and laugh. Long story short, when my brother finds out the next morning his favorite hat is gone he's pretty upset, but what can you do. Back to Morgantown, we're talking about this game and one of the Atlanta guys mentions how he has an orange Gadsden Tiger hat he found after that game. Unbelievable! I told him what happened to it and he said it didn't seem like it had been puked in. Well, he still has it and is going to ship it to me. Wait until I give my brother this hat back after almost 10 years. What a wild ride that hat has been on. Is this my "War Eagle Moment"? I doubt AU will make a commercial out of this story though.

It's about an hour before kickoff and we've been having a great time and WVU people have been so nice the whole time. Little did we know what we would experience next. We walked towards the stadium and it was like everyone in yellow had flipped a switch that said, "Get pissed". People are chanting, "asshole" at us constantly and telling us to go home.

That's not even the worst of it, once in the stadium I can't even count the number of times we were told to "fuck off" or "go the fuck back to Alabama" or "orange and blue fucking sucks". It seems they would rather be beligerant towards the road team than watch the game. Three times someone got in my face and cussed me out. One of my friends got pushed by a girl. An Auburn guy got kicked out of the game and pushed down the steps by the omnipresent state troopers who constantly patrol this section. The guy that got pushed down the steps was staying in our hotel and he told me about it. He got kicked out of the game twice by buying another ticket and deciding to sit in the same seat, the troopers busted him and kicked him out again. You know how after Auburn home games, all the nice people in their yellow t-shirts come out to "guard the field" so no one will rush it? At WVU, they bring out armed riot police with billy clubs and German shephards. They probably think that's normal.

See this link for a little of the "asshole" chant from the typical Mountaineer...
http://deadspin.com/5069143/fat-drunk-and-stupid-is-no-way-to-go-through-west-virginia-son

Here' their band director's fat ass dance he did towards the end of the game...


Needless to say, we didn't hit the town after the game out of fear for our lives and I'll never go back to Morgantown again.

There's only one thing this will be wiping up this weekend...


...Ole Miss' fans' tears.

10.24.2008

WRAS Picks the SEC - Week 9 (Part 2)

Kentucky (+23) @ Florida

Walt Flanagan: UF 38 - UK 14
Morris Fenderbaum: UF 31 - UK 7
Mickey Goldmill: Are you aware that the Gaytors have beaten Kentucky 21 straight times? Ouch! Tebow and crew should prove too much to handle for the Wildcats once again. Mickey says UF 35 – UK 13

Duke (+10) @ Vanderbilt

Walt Flanagan: Vandy 21 - Duke 10
Morris Fenderbaum: Vandy 24 - Duke 13
Mickey Goldmill: Smart kids playin' football! That’s what Mickey’s talking about. Mickey has never been to Durham but imagines the similarities between the ‘Dores and the Devils go way beyond their respective student’s starting salaries and their historically mediocre-at-best football teams. If Vandy wins this one, they are goin’ bowlin! The SEC is better than the ACC in this game. Vandy 28 – Duke 20

That’s got Mickey thinking...if anyone has any insight as to which of these two academically prestigious university’s coeds has, how should I put this, the sweeter ass, please enlighten us here at WRAS.

Georgia (+2.5) @ LSU

Walt Flanagan: LSU 21 - UGa 20
Morris Fenderbaum: UGa 21 - LSU 17
Mickey Goldmill: The game of the week in the Southeastern Conference. The loser of these one loss teams should be eliminated from BCS championship contention.* Georgia rolls into Red Stick as LSwho is coming off a drumming at the hands of Florida and a lackluster performance in the win over SC. Georgia has the more talented QB, and Mickey sees this as being the difference maker over the corndogger’s two QB system. Mickey isn’t a big fan of two QB systems right now.** UGay 18 – LSwho 17

* See LSU 2007
** See Auburn 2008

Ole Miss (-4.5) @ Arkansas

Walt Flanagan: Ole Miss 21 - Arkansas 17
Morris Fenderbaum: Ole Miss 24 - Arkansas 17
Mickey Goldmill: Nutt travels back to Fayetteville to face his former team in the battle between these two 3-4 SEC West foes. Mickey gives Nutt the advantage. Rebs 24 – Hogs 21

MTSU (+11.5) @ Mississippi State

Walt Flanagan: Miss. State 28 - MTSU 10
Morris Fenderbaum: Miss. State 21 - MTSU 7
Mickey Goldmill: The boys from Murpheesboro travel to Starkghanastan in this out of conference game for MSU. Can the Bulldogs get any offense going and get a much needed victory? MTSU has already knocked off Maryland this season. Mickey likes State to win a low scorer. MSU 16 – MTSU 13

Alabama (-6) @ Tennessee

Walt Flanagan: SPUAT 24 - Tennessee 17
Morris Fenderbaum: SPUAT 28 - Tennessee 24
Mickey Goldmill: It pains Mickey to pick the Turds to win yet again. SPUAT 28 – Vols 13

Last Week:

Walt: (5-0 straight up, 2-3 versus the spread)
Morris: (3-2, 3-2)
Mickey: (4-1, 0-5)

Total:

Walt: (42-16, 25-33)
Morris: (41-17, 30-28)
Mickey: (44-14, 23-35)

10.21.2008

WRAS Picks the SEC - Week 9 (Part 1)

Auburn (+3) at West Virginia

Walt Flanagan: AU 21 - WVU 19
Morris Fenderbaum: AU 23 - WVU 21
Mickey Goldmill: This is one of the harder picks of the year for Mickey. Mickey has only seen the 'Eer's Dan Hawkins > Bill Stewart debacle of a game earlier this season.

What the tar has happened to our beloved Tigers? Can this season be salvaged? Can Auburn make it to a bowl game? Can Auburn make it to a bowl game not in Birmingham? Lets hope in the week off coach Yox had the Tigers doing some of this



Mickey has heard every rumor and won't be surprised when Will "Boom Mutha @*!">%#@*!" Muschamp/Lane Kiffen/John Madden/Bill Cowher/Butch Davis/Ricky Bobby is named the Offensive Coordinator/Head Coach/Athletic Director on Thursday/Friday/the day before 7/the day after 7/never. Let's win a frikin ballgame already!!!

Tigers 24 – Mountain Folk 22